Around 2 o’clock this afternoon I was faced with a dilemma. I had just discovered something that absolutely blew my mind, leaving me speechlessly reeling in its wake. What was I to do? Was I to do anything at all? Should I let well enough alone?


     Then I began to argue with myself. It wasn’t well enough that needed to be left alone! It was outright, in your face wrong. Yes, I knew it to be so as little bits and pieces of this truth unraveled to reveal its inner self.


     Immediately a thousand nagging thoughts raced through my brain. I wanted to call my college professor on the double, I couldn’t handle this alone. What was it he always said about this particular subject? I couldn’t forget the countless hours I’d sat under this man that I respected, as he dealt with this very subject that had so unceremoniously smacked me upside the head today.


     Then an even bigger thought broadsided me suddenly. It matters a good deal what others believe, but all that is truly out of my hands. I was facing the biggest question of all, a question that sent me scrambling for my Bible and a notebook full of class notes.


     What did I truly believe about Calvinism?


      I’ve been introduced to a large array of Beliefs while growing up. In my family alone, there are Independent Fundamental Baptists, Holiness, Catholic, and Presbyterian. The larger than life question hit me my first month away from home, while I was at school.


       I’d grown up my whole life, going to church whenever possible and serving in any ministry that I was needed. I knew this was wrong, and that was wrong … but I had never before asked myself as to why it was wrong. I depended solely on the opinions and beliefs of my parents.


      The subject of Calvinism had arisen more than once, the topic was nothing new for me. I heard about God’s elect and how some wondered if they were just destined to go to Heaven, while others were supposed to go to Hell. It was common belief among Calvinists that they weren’t entirely in control of where they ended up. Soul Winning was entirely pointless due to their belief of Predestination.


      In school, my beliefs concerning Calvinism were questioned and I began to wonder if I believed the way I did because Mom and Dad did, or if I myself truly believed what I was living. I knew deep within that I didn’t believe in Calvinism, but I’d never before had to defend my beliefs and spit out a dozen reasons why.


     Maybe it’s time to do a little more soul searching on my part? Dad has always told me that I need to be able to back up what I believe to be true.  The Personal Evangelism class was just what I needed. I hunkered down and read numerous books on the subject that my professor encouraged us to read. 🙂

      When my beliefs on this particular subject were questioned by an unsaved individual, I was forced to quickly consider the reasoning behind all that I knew to be right. I can’t forever be shouting my beliefs from the rooftops, only to be questioned about them and have to say, “Well, I’ve just always believed that.”


      Seriously, that answer doesn’t really further their knowledge of why you believe it. That’s almost like a child saying, “Because” when asked why they lied. You know they had a motive for lying; most likely to stay out of trouble. In short, there are reasons behind everything. We don’t always have to know the how’s and the why’s of what goes on or the way things are done. But in the area of our Faith and what we believe … we should KNOW why we believe the way we do, don’t you agree?


       Granted, I didn’t give them that answer. Because I had been sitting under the teaching of a man who has done a thorough study of Calvinism. I know what I believe on the subject, and it just blows my mind that anyone could believe one very large aspect of Calvanism. This is the matter of predestination — how could anyone believe they would be chosen of  “the elect”  over their husband or wife, son or daughter?


    I find this concept of life very mind boggling. How can people be so blind?