The Best Wife that I can Be.

  As many of you know, I’m not dating. But yesterday, I picked up a book by Debi Pearl entitled Created to Be His Help Meet. While I’m waiting, I thought it would be a good idea to make the most of these next few years.

                                                 

  This morning, I finished the Introduction and First Chapter. I have incorporated it into my Devotions and found it really helpful. The first thing that really hit me this morning was:

   ~ No matter how much better I think I can do something myself, it is my husband’s role as the leader of our home to do what needs to be done. It is better for him to do something poorly (in my opinion) than for me to assume the role of leader. God put the husband in the marriage to LEAD, not FOLLOW. Women love to be controlling but they just need to step back and let their husband’s take care of things.

  I am a perfectionist. In the past year or so, I have attempted to become less crazed about anything short of Perfection. Honestly, I think I have found a happy balance. I don’t have to make people miserable because something is out of place and bothering me terribly, I can enjoy the simple — sometimes slightly out of order — course of life.

  Note:  This doesn’t mean, however, that the wife is Inferior. Both husband and wife have their God-given roles in the home and need to accept it.

  When I become a wife, I want to be the best wife that I can be. I want to encourage my husband, be his perfect help meet. Mrs. Pearl asked a simple, yet powerful question in her book. She said, “If God has already made a perfect help meet for your husband, then are you that help meet?” What she meant by this was that if God had designed a woman just for your husband that would be everything he needed, and you had to shake your head sadly in the negative that you needed to surrender to God and let Him have his perfect will in you until you ARE that perfect mate.

   ~ Secondly, almost like the first, I don’t always need to be giving my opinion on what is said or done. If my husband trusts and values my opinion, then he will feel that I am the one he can always turn to and confide in. No man likes to hear negativity about what he has chosen to do or feels directed by God to accomplish. I tend to be controlling at times, no thanks to my desire for perfection, so I find this entirely applicable to myself.

  ~ Thirdly, just a minor side note here . . . but a perfect help meet doesn’t need a list of chores. You may be wondering what on Earth I’m talking about. I’ll explain, in Mrs. Pearl’s own words. “If a wife’s desire is to please her husband, she will be motivated to look around the house for things that her husband would like to see done.”

  Okay, here is a point that I have argued recently — The wife is at home all day long. What has she been doing with her 8 hours? Yes, sometimes when the kids are bawling and supper isn’t ready and the wife looks frazzled to the core, the husband feels the perfect right to ask this. While the house should most definitely be in order, the wife might have been doing some hard-core cleaning/organizing. Come on, girls, you know what I’m talking about. We’ve helped our mom’s do this often enough for it to make sense!

  The thing to remember is that we have to cover all the bases; take care of the basic things at hand before digging deep to organize the silverware drawer and arrange the spice rack in alphabetical order while the floors go unswept and dirty dishes fill both sides of the sink.